In the spirit of giving the fans what they want, we'll throw down to St George Illawarra captain Blake Lawrie straight after full-time.
I'm captain? Really? Oh, that's right. Our usual one is the only bloke who wants to walk further from home base than Jonny Bairstow, and the other one we had, um, yeah, you know why he can't do it all the time. Full credit to everyone who turned up here tonight. I can't believe people are still bothering to watch us. I mean, there's a concert next door. I thought that might have been what all the traffic was for outside the ground. By the way, have you got Flanno's number?
Ah, thanks...